BE WELL

Haters Gonna Hate

Haters Gonna Hate

This is sad, but true: there will always be haters; people who want to bring you down.

Adding to the problem, they usually happen to be family or close friends.

You know: that relative that makes fun of how you’re eating, the friend who underhandedly puts you down, or the acquaintance that says nasty things about the business you’re trying to build for yourself.

We first have to understand why they are being negative and hurtful. It’s my understanding that people will say these things for two reasons:

1. They don’t understand.

2. They are envious.

What other reason would there be? If a person understands you and is comfortable with themselves and their life, they would emit positivity and support instead of insult and negativity.

So how do you handle these situations?

Most importantly, don’t ever criticize people for not doing what you are (eating healthier, losing weight, starting a business, etc).

When I first transitioned to plant-based, in response to their questioning and attacks about my eating choices, I went through a phase of telling every one of my family members about how bad what they were eating was for them and how what I was doing was better. Big no no. I ended up in a few arguments and always left feeling defeated as a result. I hate to admit that it took me upwards of a year to learn that this wasn’t the right way to go about things.

I’ve since learned that you can’t make people hear what they don’t want to hear. Whether they are closed-minded or they make remarks because they see how healthy and happy you are and don’t feel able yet to make changes themselves, you can’t make someone understand if they do not want to.

I have found the best solution to be to take the high ground. If someone makes a snide remark, ignore it if it doesn’t bother you or tell them the comment was hurtful to you if it was. Don’t attack, just calmly explain how it hurts your feelings.

If this person continues to hate even after you’ve returned kindness and explained your hurt feelings, move on. Clearly, this isn’t a person that needs to be in your life.

Let them come to you. If a person is ready to change or has questions, they WILL come to you for answers. Then, feel no reservations about happily explaining.

So, to come full circle:

Haters gonna hate. Don’t participate.

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